BASE YOUR LOVE ON CHOICE NOT ONLY ON YOUR EMOTIONS

 

Love, in its absolute essence, defies rigid definition. It is fluid, unpredictable, and deeply personal. One might profess love today, only to feel its intensity fade tomorrow, as though the words were never spoken. Love flourishes most when it is mutual when affection is reciprocated, it creates an undeniable warmth that reassures and uplifts. Yet, the nature of love remains difficult to articulate; the experience itself is often beyond words.

Love has the power to drive us to actions that defy logic. It compels us to move, to dream, to sacrifice sometimes without realizing how we arrived at a place or why we made certain choices. As Esther Perel, a modern relationship expert, writes, “Love is not a permanent state of enthusiasm. But it is an investment in one another’s growth.” It transcends time and age, embracing both the young and old with equal passion. When love takes hold, it does so with a force that is impossible to ignore, filling life with boundless joy.

In today’s world, love manifests in countless ways. Parents sacrifice sleep and personal time to care for their newborns, pouring their energy into nurturing a tiny life just as psychologist Erich Fromm observed that “Love is the active concern for the life and growth of that which we love.” Best friends stay up through the night talking, offering emotional support and listening even when life feels overwhelming. Couples in long-distance relationships bridge the gap with technology sending voice notes, video chatting, and leaving heartfelt messages to make each other feel close, despite the miles. Love shows itself when someone stands up for their partner, defends a friend in need, or forgives when forgiveness feels impossible.

Beauty holds no sway over love, for true affection is rooted in the heart and soul, not in appearances. The saying, “beauty lies in the eye of the beholder,” reminds us that love is shaped by perception rather than superficial attraction. To build a love that endures, one must rely not solely on momentary sentiments but on conscious choice. Love founded on choice fosters resilience, it grants individuals the strength to navigate challenges whether in romantic relationships, friendships, or familial bonds. It is this deliberate commitment that sustains love through life’s inevitable trials. As modern writer Alain de Botton notes, “The love we seek is the love we are not yet able to give.”

Emotions, however powerful, are ever-changing and not bound by static laws. While we cannot fully control how we feel, we can shape how we respond to those emotions. Love based on choice offers clarity and stability, ensuring that relationships are sustained not just by passion but by intention. “Love is not only something you feel, it is something you do,” wrote David Wilkerson, highlighting the active nature of love beyond mere emotions. In embracing love with mindfulness, we gain the ability to nurture it with wisdom and devotion, making it a lasting presence in our lives.

Love today is also about presence, the quiet kind of love that doesn’t always demand grand gestures. It’s about showing up when it matters most, being there in the ordinary moments, and building trust through shared experiences. As the poet Warsan Shire so beautifully puts it, “You can’t make homes out of human beings. Someone should have already told you that.” A love that endures is one rooted in understanding, kindness, and the ability to choose each other, day after day.

Love should be grounded in conscious choice, not merely driven by fleeting emotions. While emotions can ignite passion, it is deliberate commitment that sustains love through life’s challenges. Choosing love means embracing loyalty, understanding, and resilience, ensuring that love is not just a feeling, but an enduring decision.

EMBRACE DIVINE WISDOM

 Drafted on 25th May,2015

Wisdom is a profound element of the human experience that transcends intellectual capacity. From a Christian perspective, true wisdom is divine, transformative, and essential for righteous living. 
Wisdom, as understood in the Christian context, is a deeper insight that allows an individual to discern what is good and morally upright as opposed to what is evil or misguided. While material wealth is often desired, it is through wisdom that one learns not only to possess but also to multiply wealth righteously. There exists a clear distinction between riches and wealth: riches can be accumulated through various means, both ethical and unethical, but wealth, in its enduring form, is a result of divine grace, sustained by godly wisdom.
Wisdom in God’s Kingdom is not automatically bestowed; it is given upon request. James 1:5 encourages believers to ask for wisdom from God, who gives generously without reproach. This divine wisdom is not to be confused with worldly cunning or manipulative intelligence. Rather, it is a pure, peace-loving, and sincere quality that reflects the nature of God Himself (James 3:17).
The Scriptures frequently personify wisdom as a woman calling out to humanity, offering guidance and understanding to those who seek her. Proverbs 9:1–5 paints a vivid image of wisdom as a host preparing a feast, inviting the simple to dine and be transformed by knowledge and insight. Wisdom is inclusive, generous, and transformative.
In everyday life, the difference between worldly and divine wisdom becomes evident through outcomes and motivations. Worldly wisdom may produce temporary success, but it often comes at the cost of integrity or relationships. For instance, business strategies rooted in deceit may yield short-term profit but long-term damage.
On the other hand, divine wisdom promotes sustainability, trust, and ethical progress. A Christian entrepreneur guided by God’s wisdom will prioritize fair dealings, employee welfare, and social responsibility. In family life, divine wisdom cultivates patience, effective communication, and godly parenting. In personal finances, it fosters stewardship, generosity, and long-term planning.
Seek God’s Wisdom Daily in Prayer: Begin each day asking for guidance (James 1:5). Make it a habit to pray before making significant decisions. Immerse Yourself in Scripture: God’s wisdom is embedded in His Word. Reading and meditating on books like Proverbs, Ecclesiastes, and James equips believers with practical life principles.
Actively Listen to Godly Counsel: Accept instruction from parents, mentors, pastors, or spiritually mature friends (Proverbs 5:1). Wisdom often comes through community.
Practice Obedience and Reverence: The fear of the Lord is the foundation of wisdom (Proverbs 9:10). Obeying God’s principles even when it's difficult brings long-term rewards.
Reflect and Evaluate Regularly: Take time to assess decisions, relationships, and results. Use wisdom to identify areas for growth and correction.
Applying divine wisdom in personal development encourages humility and teachability. It inspires a commitment to lifelong learning and spiritual maturity. Whether in academics, career decisions, or relationships, godly wisdom provides clarity and discernment. For example, a student guided by wisdom will balance ambition with integrity, valuing education as a tool for service, not just personal gain.
Ecclesiastes 7:11–12 affirms that wisdom, like an inheritance, brings benefit to those who live under the sun. It is a defense, just as money is a defense, but wisdom surpasses because it gives life. Practically, this means managing finances with prudence: avoiding debt traps, investing wisely, saving systematically, and giving generously.
Riches without wisdom often lead to ruin, but when governed by divine principles, wealth becomes a channel of blessing. The tithe, honest gain, and charitable giving are all practical applications of godly financial wisdom.
In leadership, wisdom is indispensable. Whether managing a team, leading a ministry, or governing a household, divine wisdom enables just decisions, conflict resolution, and vision setting. Proverbs 8 describes how kings and rulers govern rightly by wisdom. Today, every believer, regardless of title, is called to lead in their sphere with integrity and spiritual insight.
Accessing God’s wisdom begins with the fear of the Lord. Proverbs 9:10 declares that “the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.” This reverential awe of God positions the believer to receive instruction not only from Scripture but also from life’s everyday teachers.
The wisdom of God is not only a theological ideal but a practical necessity. It transforms lives, empowers leadership, and facilitates prosperity. It is accessed through prayer, reverence, community, and Scripture. As Proverbs affirms, wisdom is calling out to all. By responding with open hearts and willing hands, believers can live impactful, righteous, and fruitful lives in every sphere of influence.
Another powerful gift is favor or grace, which can elevate a person unexpectedly. Favor has the power to lift the lowly and place them among the great. But to maintain favor, one must apply wisdom. There are many who had the opportunity to meet influential people or experience open doors, but due to a lack of wisdom, they lost those opportunities.

Wisdom is essential in sustaining the blessings we receive. It teaches us how not to misuse the grace or favor in our lives. A wise individual knows how to preserve relationships, honor responsibilities, and build lasting impact.

Wisdom is key. In all your pursuits, get understanding. Wisdom comes with many benefits: peace, clarity, patience, humility, and the strength to overcome life’s storms. A wise person lives with understanding and patience, and through that, can live peacefully even with enemies.

 Embrace divine wisdom. It is available to all, regardless of faith or background. It is the pathway to a fulfilling, purposeful life.

Author: Anthony Nana Yaw Dzacka

ACCEPT YOUR MISTAKES; BE READY TO CHANGE FOR THE BETTER

Drafted on 12th &15th May,2008.

Accept your mistakes and be ready to change for the better. Most of the time, you commit many errors in your life, but you refuse to see that you are at fault. Sometimes, you even protest, quarrel, get annoyed, or fight when others point out your mistakes, hoping you will recognize them and improve. But this is not how it should be.

Knowing your mistakes is one of the best habits you can adopt in your daily life. Learning to recognize where you have gone wrong helps you grow not just physically, but mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. This is because you make an effort not to repeat the same mistake again. Mistakes, when acknowledged and reflected upon, become powerful tools for self-development.

The mistakes you make are sometimes due to your own desires. This happens because, deep down, you might already know that what you're doing is not the right thing. Yet, you go ahead with your actions because they align with what you want at the moment. Then, when the outcome doesn’t match your expectations, you become upset. You feel disappointed or even hurt not because you didn’t see it coming, but because you ignored the truth in the first place. You failed to prepare yourself for the consequences, and now the result has taken you by surprise.

Some mistakes may also happen while you're trying to do something new, challenging, or important. And this, I call an “opportunity for correction” or “a chance to adopt a new strategy "one that can help you address problems that lie ahead. I use this expression because the mistake you make can lead you to explore other approaches, to think more deeply, or to act differently. In trying to solve it, you might even discover something new, something you hadn’t thought of before. That discovery could hold the key to both the original problem and future success.

When we look at it this way, we begin to understand that a mistake is not the end. It is often the beginning of improvement. It’s a wake-up call, a redirection, or even a gift in disguise, guiding us to do better than before.

It’s important to remember that making a mistake does not make you a bad person. As John Maxwell (2007) said, “A mistake is not a person; it is an event.” This quote holds a deep truth. No matter how many times you fail, never allow yourself to think or say that there's no need for correction. There is always room for correction. Mistakes are not meant to shame us; they are meant to teach us. It is not weak to admit a mistake it is wise.

Also, it is important not only to learn from your own mistakes but also from the mistakes of others. As Eleanor Roosevelt said, “Learn from the mistakes of others. You can’t live long enough to make them all yourself.” This is a reminder that we should observe, listen, and reflect on what others have been through. Their failures can be lessons for us too. They can help us avoid pitfalls that might otherwise hold us back.

Mistakes, therefore, are bound to happen. They are part of life. But it is up to us to do our best to stop them from becoming harmful. Some mistakes can cost us time, peace, or even relationships but if we deal with them early, learn from them, and make changes, they can become stepping stones instead of stumbling blocks.

For every mistake or problem, there is a solution. It may not come immediately, but with reflection, effort, and humility, a way forward will always show itself. What matters most is our attitude whether we choose to stay stuck in denial, or whether we choose to rise, correct ourselves, and grow.

Author: Anthony Nana Yaw Dzacka

THE TRANSFORMATIVE POWER OF GIVING

14TH &15TH MAY 2008 

 Why True Generosity Enriches the Giver, the Receiver, and the World

 

 

Giving should be a natural and essential part of our lives as Christians. Yet many of us have overlooked its significance. Giving is not merely a religious duty; it is a universal virtue that blesses individuals and societies. It reflects God’s heart and reveals the depth of our character.

 

Giving: A Reflection of Our Character

 

We give for various reasons—out of love, compassion, gratitude, or a sense of duty. Ultimately, giving unveils who we truly are. As Jesus said:

 

“For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” Matthew 6:21

 

True generosity is unconditional. It expects nothing in return. Unfortunately, we sometimes give in exchange for favours or affection. While such giving appears generous, it can stem from self-interest.

 

The Dangers of Conditional Giving

 

Giving with expectations can lead to disappointment, manipulation, and corruption. When generosity is tied to personal gain, it opens the door to societal vices such as:

• Bribery

• Dishonesty

• Corruption

• Inefficiency

As Scripture warns: “Whoever is greedy for unjust gain troubles his household, but he who hates bribes will live.” Proverbs 15:27. Even giving to win romantic affection can result in broken hearts and unmet expectations. Giving must be rooted in love, not in control.

 

The Call to Give Freely

 

The Bible calls us to give with joy and sincerity: “Each one must give as he has decided in his heart, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.” 

2 Corinthians 9:7

Giving in this spirit produces virtues such as:

• Joy

• Contentment

• Self-satisfaction

• Humility

• Faith

It transforms our perspective, aligning us with God’s purposes.

 

The Reward of Sacrificial Giving

 

True giving often involves sacrifice. Jesus praised the poor widow who gave her last coins because her gift came from the heart not her surplus (Mark 12:41–44).

Likewise, Proverbs reminds us: “A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.” Proverbs 11:25

You can never truly lose what you give away in love. Every sincere gift leaves a mark—on your heart and in the lives of others.

 

Giving as a Way of Life

When we learn to give freely and in the right spirit, we become vessels of God’s grace. Our families, communities, and nations benefit. Needs are met. Love is shared. Faith is strengthened.

“It is more blessed to give than to receive.” Acts 20:35

Let us, therefore, embrace the gift of giving not out of obligation, but as a way of life. In doing so, we mirror the generosity of our Creator and help build a more compassionate world.

Every gift matters—but the ones that change us are the ones we give with love. Let your generosity be a legacy that outlives you.

 

Author : Anthony Nana Yaw Dzacka